nattalie | (no subject)

To not talk again about all the stress I have at work let's write a little about Michael.

For those who has read all my complaining about him maybe you think he is a lazy and childish ass. Well be are agree that he needs be an adult and face his problems but there is something that makes it harder.
Michael has a health problem called sleep apnea which make him snoring, breath pauses and choking. I controlled him while he sleeps and he literally stop breathing for several seconds, then his body fights hard to get air until he makes choking noises and get some air to his lungs.... and then all the process starts again. This is the way he "sleeps" the whole night and of course he keep waking up because his noises, and he doesn't really rest. This makes him feel tired, irritated, depressed, and during the day he keeps falling asleep everywhere. He also has some extra weight that he wants to lose which doesn't help to his problem.
I have tried to motivate him to do something else after work, but he can't keep a routine, then he feels a failure and get more depressed. Sometimes I lose my patience and I think he makes excuses then I remember how painful is looking at him when he sleeps, so just him really knows how harder is fix this situation, and I should support him instead push him. I try...
He went to the Dr 1 month ago who confirmed his issue. Dr sent him to run a sleep test, but it cost 1000 usd and Mike doesn't want pay for it. There is a mask for breathing he can use to sleep but he needs first do the test. I'm worry because the apnea makes his blood preassure go high.

So far he leaves the pills for anxiety because it makes his apnea worse and today he started doing workout and walking. He tried to do it before then he leaves after the first day.
He also stops wasting his time with games or watching series and it seems he is studying to do the mobile app together.

I write about this because I want to be his support and help him. This is not about MY expectations, this is 100% about him, I need remember this.

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The device that controls sleep apnea is highly recommended because apnea causes irreparable damage to heart, brain and leads to premature death. He may save $1000 and lose a chance to live a happy life, but this is his choice and his responsibility. Sometimes it is hard to respect someone's choice, but what else can we do? In my opinion, it is impossible to motivate an adult to take care of own health. The only motivation that works perfectly with anyone is fear. A true fear for life make people change their lifestyles dramatically. As soon as fear fades away, the old habits get back. Are you sure this is your calling to address it for your bf?

I am not sure but this is the way I am, supportive

Untreated sleep apnoea has a HUGE effect on a person's day to day life, and it can cause a number of different health problems. It leave a person feeling so exhausted that what energy they do have goes into getting through the basics. I'm not at all surprised he struggles with motivation when he is so sleep deprived. It's the sort of thing you don't realise how crap it's making you feel until you get the treatment for it. It's like getting a pair of glasses and seeing clearly for the first time. $1000 is not a small amount of money but it would be completely worth it to get the C-PAP mask. It will also make losing weight easier because if he can sleep better he won't crave the sorts of things people who are sleep deprived crave because their bodies are so desperate for energy. It really messes up the hormones involves in hunger and satiety too.

Edited 2017-08-24 08:45 (UTC)

this week he is doing well. He did workout every day and last night he told me he is going to see how much the insurance will pay for the sleep thing. I hope he keeps this attitude.